Whether or not you’re studying this since you’re considering of giving anal play a attempt otherwise you think about your self one thing of an anal sexpert, welcome. By now, you’ve in all probability been uncovered to the concept that anal might be loads of enjoyable. However it may possibly additionally increase a bunch of intimate questions you would possibly really feel too embarrassed to ask, nicely, anybody.
Fortunately, asking medical doctors intimate questions is sort of our forte right here at SELF. Under, you’ll discover 13 frequent anal intercourse questions and their solutions. Hope you’re prepared to be taught.
1. Do I really want to use lube? What occurs if I don’t?
Utilizing lube is a should throughout anal play, Joseph Frankhouse, M.D., medical director of colorectal surgical procedure at Legacy Well being in Oregon, tells SELF. Whereas the vagina produces pure lubrication, the anus doesn’t. Anal penetration with out enough lubrication could cause the tissue in your anus to tear.
Not solely is that painful, it additionally makes you extra vulnerable to sexually transmitted infections, like gonorrhea and HIV, Jacques Moritz, M.D., ob/gyn at Weill Cornell Drugs, tells SELF. That’s as a result of these tears create openings within the pores and skin, doubtlessly permitting infection-causing pathogens to enter.
Even when you use lube, some tearing would possibly nonetheless occur, relying on the quantity you employ, the scale of no matter you’re placing in there, and the extent of friction concerned. Nonetheless, including a ton of lube to the combination makes you much less possible to tear and extra possible to have enjoyable.
2. OK, I want to use lube. Obtained it. What sort ought to I exploit?
When it comes to lube, you just about have three choices: oil-based, silicone-based, and water-based.
Oil-based and silicone-based lubes are thicker and longer-lasting, making them nice for anal play. However oil-based lubes can break down condoms and render them much less efficient, so when you’re utilizing a condom, avoid this type of lube.
In case you’re bringing silicone anal toys into the combination, you’ll need to keep away from silicone-based lubes, since this type of lube erodes silicone toys.
Mainly, when you’re partaking in anal play, utilizing condoms, and/or utilizing silicone toys, you’ll positively need to persist with water-based lube. And it doesn’t matter what sort of lube you employ, make sure that any toy you’re inserting into your anus has a flared base for simple removing.
three. What about numbing lotions?
Numbing lotions that use anesthetics like benzocaine are extensively out there. That doesn’t imply you must use them for anal, Natasha Chinn, M.D., a New Jersey-based ob/gyn, tells SELF.
Your nerve endings are delicate for a purpose. They alert your mind to ache so you may stop your self from getting significantly injured, Dr. Chinn says. Whereas numbing lotions would possibly make anal penetration really feel simpler, they don’t make it any simpler bodily. By numbing your anus, you or your associate could possibly be pushing your physique previous its level of consolation with out even realizing it.
As a substitute, simply take issues slowly and talk along with your associate. Anal play might be loads of enjoyable, and also you shouldn’t have to numb your self to take pleasure in it.
four. Can we nonetheless want to use a condom?
Except you and your associate are in a dedicated monogamous relationship and have each been examined lately, you must use condoms throughout anal intercourse to cut back to danger of sexually transmitted infections and HIV, Dr. Chinn says. Yup, you may get STIs in your butt.
Utilizing a brand new condom is particularly necessary when you’re switching from anal to vaginal penetration so you may keep away from shifting micro organism out of your anus to your vagina or urethra. Your anus is house to all types of micro organism your vagina and associated elements aren’t used to—particularly, gastrointestinal (GI) micro organism, like E. coli. When this micro organism reaches your vagina, it may possibly trigger vaginal infections, like bacterial vaginosis, which might lead to vaginal itching, burning throughout urination, a “fishy” vaginal odor, and grey, white, or inexperienced vaginal discharge, in accordance to the Mayo Clinic. It could possibly additionally unfold to your urethra, the place it may possibly trigger a urinary tract an infection. In accordance to the Mayo Clinic, this will trigger signs like consistently needing to pee, then a burning sensation once you do, together with cloudy urine and pelvic ache.
Lengthy story brief? In case you insert something into your anus, clear it off and/or roll on a brand new condom earlier than placing it into your vagina.
Value noting: Even when you and your associate aren’t nervous about STIs or HIV, utilizing a condom might make you are feeling extra snug if…mess…is a priority.
5. Earlier than we go any additional, I should know: Is there any likelihood of me pooping on my associate throughout anal?
Let’s stroll by what truly occurs inside your physique once you poop. Meals begins in your abdomen, the place it will get damaged down. Then, it passes by your small gut, the place it will get digested much more. The remaining meals waste, aka poop, will get saved in your giant gut, which is a protracted tube also called the colon, in accordance to the Nationwide Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Illnesses (NIDDK).
When there’s a bunch of waste in your colon that wants to come out, your colon contracts and pushes the stool into the rectum, an Eight-inch chamber that connects the colon to the anus. Your mind receives the sign that you just want to head to the lavatory someday quickly, and your rectum shops the stool till you voluntarily contract it to push the poop out.
In anal play, when you get previous your anus, anal intercourse takes place in your rectum, which isn’t actually a storage space for poop until a bowel motion is imminent. Which means the chances of you truly pooping in your associate mid-act are very, very low, Dr. Moritz says. In case you’ve lately pooped and also you don’t have any well being points that make pooping a bit much less predictable, like ulcerative colitis, a ton of feces in all probability gained’t sneak up on you mid-anal.
Sadly, there’s a little bit of a catch right here. Once you poop, your physique ought to expel all of the stool in your rectum, however some fecal matter would possibly get left behind. When you in all probability don’t have to fear about pooping in your associate, you must know that they could be uncovered to some seen or invisible fecal matter, Dr. Chinn says. Nobody wants to panic. It’s so simple as washing it off with cleaning soap and water (or altering the condom), washing your fingers, and persevering with on along with your life, whether or not or not which means getting again to anal intercourse. Nevertheless it’s positively one thing that each one events ought to pay attention to earlier than you begin.
6. Individuals all the time say you want to “work up” to anal. How do I do this?
You’ll positively need to reserve a while for foreplay earlier than anal the identical method you’ll for another sort of penetration. That’s to give your physique time to calm down. Your rectum is designed to hold poop in with assist from a muscle known as the anal sphincter. This will make anal penetration a little bit difficult at first, Dr. Moritz says.
You can begin by asking your associate to offer you a therapeutic massage or do one thing else you already know will loosen you up. “It takes a little bit of time to calm down [the anal sphincter],” Dr. Frankhouse says.
Then, once you really feel cool, calm, and prepared to begin exploring anal play, you or your associate can use a finger or intercourse toy to therapeutic massage the surface of your anus. This may also help you get acquainted with the feeling earlier than any sort of penetration occurs. When you’re starting to take pleasure in your self, Dr. Chinn says you may experiment with sticking a finger or intercourse toy in your anus little by little primarily based on what feels good, utilizing loads of lube, in fact.
Take as a lot time as you want, and make certain to talk along with your associate.
7. What’s the cope with oral-anal play? Is it protected? Sanitary?
Unprotected anilingus—the right identify for “rim jobs,” “tossing salad,” or your different favourite oral-anal euphemism—can truly be safer and extra sanitary than you would possibly count on, Dr. Chinn says.
Whereas there’s positively gastrointestinal micro organism in and round your associate’s anus, it’s in all probability not going to trigger a gastrointestinal sickness like meals poisoning once you ingest it. The exception is that if they really have a GI problem themselves, Dr. Frankhouse says. It’s a reasonably easy rule: If the anilingus receiver has had any uncommon bowel actions these days, it’s in all probability finest to take this exercise off the menu for now. That features stool that’s runnier than ordinary, bowel actions which can be kind of frequent than ordinary, and even irregular anal itching. All of those could possibly be indicators that there’s additional micro organism hanging out down there, which is unquestionably not very best for anilingus.
Then there’s the sexually transmitted an infection problem. You possibly can completely transmit and contract STIs through unprotected anilingus. Utilizing a dental dam may also help lower down on that danger.
If the receiver has had regular, common bowel actions they usually’re STI-free (otherwise you’re utilizing safety), anilingus is mostly protected, Dr. Frankhouse says. And when you’re simply involved about operating into stray bits of poop, ask them to clear the world with water and a mild washcloth so it’s as pristine as doable earlier than you dive in.
Eight. If my associate has a penis, can they only stick all of it inside, or simply the tip?
As soon as your associate will get previous that tight anal sphincter, there’s loads of room in your rectum for a penis. It’s round eight inches, keep in mind? Have (gradual, protected, consensual) enjoyable.
9. Do some positions make anal penetration simpler than others?
Although there’s no one-size-fits-all information to intercourse positions, Dr. Chinn says being on high would possibly make first-time anal intercourse a little bit simpler. That permits extra management over how deep the penetration goes and the way slowly it occurs. As a bonus, there’s additionally the prospect to add some clitoral stimulation, if that’s your factor.
In case you’re extra skilled with anal, you may have your associate penetrate you from behind by doggy-style, spooning intercourse, or another comparable place, Dr. Chinn says. This will supply a “fuller” feeling. You or your associate may present some added clitoral stimulation in these positions.
10. Do I want to do an enema beforehand? Is it even protected to get one?
An enema entails pumping water or saline into the rectum to dissolve any stool that’s hanging out in there, making it simpler to poop out. Because it’s fairly handy to simply seize an enema package at your native drugstore, some folks recommend doing this earlier than anal to keep away from any feces making an look within the bed room.
You don’t want to. As we simply established, the possibilities of you pooping in your associate mid-act are slim to none. However there’s normally no hurt in doing an enema so long as you are not doing it usually sufficient to irritate your rectum, Dr. Frankhouse says. He recommends solely doing them as soon as each few months and following the directions each time. In case your butt begins feeling irritated once you do enemas, that is an indication you must give up.
11. It’s doable for me to orgasm from anal?
OK, so right here’s the place we get into some fascinating G-spot and P-spot territory. The G-spot is believed to be a cluster of vaginal, urethral, and clitoral tissues and nerves, Dr. Chinn says. Whereas the precise location of this cluster varies from particular person to particular person, some folks can really feel it once they put stress on the entrance vaginal wall, about one or two inches contained in the vagina. The emphasis right here is on “some.” There’s truly a reasonably large debate in regards to the G-spot within the intercourse schooling and medical fields.
“I hate to say I am not a giant G-spot believer. There definitely are some nerves, however [research hasn’t] been in a position to anatomically display a lot regularly,” Mary Jane Minkin, M.D., a scientific professor of obstetrics, gynecology, and reproductive sciences at Yale Medical Faculty, tells SELF. “I feel ladies have areas which can be extra delicate than others, particular person exploration is nice, and people can expertise stimulation in all types of locations.”
In case you’re constructive you’ve got a G-spot and are excited in regards to the prospect of orgasming from anal, it actually is dependent upon whether or not yours is delicate sufficient to really feel anal penetration. Don’t fear if this isn’t the case for you, as a result of it’s sometimes not straightforward for anal to stimulate this space, Dr. Chinn says. With that mentioned, if clitoral stimulation helps you orgasm, you or your associate can add that to the combination throughout anal to show you how to get there.
Then there’s the P-spot, which is a cutesy identify for the prostate gland. This chestnut-sized gland is situated contained in the pelvis, upward and behind the penis, between the bladder and rectum. Stimulating it may possibly really feel unbelievably good for some folks, Dr. Frankhouse says, and might even end in orgasm.
So, to reply your query, are you able to orgasm from anal? Perhaps. Orgasms are such a person factor that it’s exhausting to say a particular sure or no to this one.
12. Gynecologists all the time inform folks to pee after intercourse. Does the identical go for anal and pooping?
Doctors suggest that you just pee after intercourse to flush out any micro organism that’s gotten into your urethra throughout intercourse. This may also help you keep away from UTIs.
Since that sort of bacterial contamination doesn’t actually occur throughout anal, Dr. Frankhouse says there’s no purpose to power your self to poop afterward when you don’t really feel the necessity to.
This recommendation nonetheless stands in case your associate ejaculates inside you. Although some folks fear this might trigger runny poops that resemble diarrhea, Dr. Frankhouse says this truly isn’t the case. For one factor, since poop normally isn’t in your rectum till you’re shut to expelling it, there’s no actual alternative for poop and semen to combine. Even when poop may go farther up into your colon, semen is normally runny. Since your anus will possible stay expanded for a couple of minutes after anal intercourse, that semen can simply leak proper on out, Dr. Frankhouse says.
13. Is there anything I ought to know?
So, about anal intercourse accidents: They’re unusual, however they’ll occur. In accordance to Dr. Frankhouse, you must see a physician when you’re experiencing any of the next inside a number of days of getting anal intercourse:
- Bleeding, which could possibly be an indication of anal fissures (small tears within the tissue lining the anus)
- Persistent ache, which is also an indication of anal fissures
- Sores, lumps, or warts across the anus, which could possibly be an indication of HPV or one other STI
- Uncommon discharge that appears like pus, which may sign gonorrhea or chlamydia
That data could be very vital, however I refuse to finish this on a sort of scary be aware. The reality is that you just can have a wonderful time with anal play. Or it could possibly be the precise reverse of your factor, which is OK, too. Both method, when you hold the above data in thoughts, you’re far more possible to come out of the expertise having explored anal intercourse in a protected, wholesome, doubtlessly mind-blowing method.